That’s right, Ladies and Gentlemen! Stay tuned during prime time tonight and see what the world is going crazy about! Find out what Oprah wants to stuff under every seat in America!
That’s right! Tonight only, we have that mesmerizing stupor star who is sharper than a Ginsu knife in a snow storm, almost as useful as a pocket fisherman in the desert! He doesn’t need a microphone, he IS Mr. Microphone! You owe it to your family, to yourself, (and to the government once he’s elected) to watch Mr. B.O. slice and dice the truth as he effectively weasels his way into your heart and deep into your wallet.
Yes, I know. You’re asking, “But, Ron, is his sweet talking ways really that effective?” Don’t take my word on it! Just look how he managed to delay a major Baseball game for this Infomercial … the very Pennant Race Game that Mother Nature herself had already delayed through her powers. If this doesn’t prove that he is as powerful as Mother Nature, I’ll refund your vote. (Note: Refund offer void where prohibited and prohibited where void.)
Of course, everyone who watches will ask, “Does B.O. smell as good as he looks?” Hey! After four years, no one has complained of those odorous whiffs from his Senatorial pork spending. You know he’s as fresh as a daisy!
Speaking of which, unlike this year’s election, ABC is giving you a choice and airing “Pushing Daisies” at the same time as this Infomercial. But you have to ask yourself, “Do I want to watch a show about fantasy and the humorous murders of dreams or do I want to watch ‘Pushing Daisies’?”
But wait! There’s more! Vote now and he’ll include an equally deceptive counterpart complete with laugh-filled moments of flaws and flubs. You too can have the infamous, “”When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television…” That’s right, act now and with this Veg-O-Matic, you can be entertained for months on end by his political antics. For three easy payments (and one really complicate payment that involves your freedoms), you too can have two bureaucratics for the price of one! All this and much, much more!
So call and vote now and be a part of the nightmare, er, of his dream! Operators are standing by … because they can’t have chairs … not taxing enough …
Next week, we will fall in line with the TV and news coverage. So be sure to tune in for our passing nod to the high quality product: the J.M. Rotisserie. Just stick a fork in him, folks. He’s done.
Popularity: unranked [?]
That’s right, Ladies and Gentlemen! Stay tuned during prime time tonight and see what the world is going crazy about! Find out what Oprah wants to stuff under every seat in America!
That’s right! Tonight only, we have that mesmerizing stupor star who is sharper than a Ginsu knife in a snow storm, almost as useful as a pocket fisherman in the desert! He doesn’t need a microphone, he IS Mr. Microphone! You owe it to your family, to yourself, (and to the government once he’s elected) to watch Mr. B.O. slice and dice the truth as he effectively weasels his way into your heart and deep into your wallet.
Yes, I know. You’re asking, “But, Ron, is his sweet talking ways really that effective?” Don’t take my word on it! Just look how he managed to delay a major Baseball game for this Infomercial … the very Pennant Race Game that Mother Nature herself had already delayed through her powers. If this doesn’t prove that he is as powerful as Mother Nature, I’ll refund your vote. (Note: Refund offer void where prohibited and prohibited where void.)
Of course, everyone who watches will ask, “Does B.O. smell as good as he looks?” Hey! After four years, no one has complained of those odorous whiffs from his Senatorial pork spending. You know he’s as fresh as a daisy!
Speaking of which, unlike this year’s election, ABC is giving you a choice and airing “Pushing Daisies” at the same time as this Infomercial. But you have to ask yourself, “Do I want to watch a show about fantasy and the humorous murders of dreams or do I want to watch ‘Pushing Daisies’?”
But wait! There’s more! Vote now and he’ll include an equally deceptive counterpart complete with laugh-filled moments of flaws and flubs. You too can have the infamous, “”When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television…” That’s right, act now and with this Veg-O-Matic, you can be entertained for months on end by his political antics. For three easy payments (and one really complicate payment that involves your freedoms), you too can have two bureaucratics for the price of one! All this and much, much more!
So call and vote now and be a part of the nightmare, er, of his dream! Operators are standing by … because they can’t have chairs … not taxing enough …
Next week, we will fall in line with the TV and news coverage. So be sure to tune in for our passing nod to the high quality product: the J.M. Rotisserie. Just stick a fork in him, folks. He’s done.
Popularity: unranked [?]
Written by sprezzaturon in:
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Ron Popeil | Tags:
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Speak of which, unlike this year’s election, ABC is giving you a choice and airing “Pushing UP Daisies” at the same time as this Infomercial. But you have to ask yourself, “Do I want to watch a show about fantasy and the humorous murders of dreams or do I want to watch ‘Pushing UP Daisies’?”
At first I thought … Speaking of which, but then it looks all right as Speak of which …
you forgot the UP in between Pushing and Daisies, of course I bet you were thinking of me and your UP was somewhere else when you wrote this post … LOL!
I love it! :*
This is very nice post. thank you.
Good pointsI would note that as someone who really doesnt write on blogs much (in fact, this may be my first post), I dont think the term lurker is very becoming to a non-posting reader. Its not your fault really , but perhaps the blogosphere could come up with a better, non-creepy name for the 90% of us that enjoy reading the content .
I was just chatting with my friend about this the other day at lunch . Don’t know how in the world we got on the topic actually , they brought it up. I do recall having a wonderful chicken salad with cranberries on it. I digress…
Nice site, I just dugg this keep up the good work!. . . . . .
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I love taking photos. I need to spend more money and get a decent camera though. Anyways, nice and informative content and your blog in general looks very cool. Keep up the good work.
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