The Invention That Will Change The World!
An amazing technological breakthrough has been announced by the University of Bristol in England! I predict that this will revolutionize the world! Is it a cure for cancer, a car that runs on air, teenagers that do their chores without complaining? No, something even better — nonstick gum! When this was announced, you could hear the collective sighs of relief from theater workers who scrapped gum from under chairs and off the floor, from restaurant workers who tackle the undersides of tables, and from children with bald patches where gummy hair once resided before being hacked away by their frustrated mothers. Next to the inventions of the wheel and fire, this truly is a great day for humankind!
I wonder how the flavor is going to stick to this new gum … not that it does to regular gum now.
